Dishonest people exist and that’s anything but new in marriages. But being dishonest, trustworthy and a cheater can make life hell for your significant other when committing to a marriage.
It’s safe to say that people can surprise you when you least expect them. Having malicious intentions can break your spouses’ heart. But have you ever wondered why people do it? Has it occurred to you why some people are dishonest in marriages?
If so, then we have the article just for you as we will talk about the 3 reasons why some people are that way. With all that said, let’s start.
1. Some Lie To Protect
While we talked about dishonesty being a bad thing, it doesn’t necessarily have to be ten times out of ten. There is a huge difference between flat out lying and lying to protect someone. It’s all about what you’re hoping to achieve.
Some people lie to cover their cheating habits, others lie to protect. The latter is certainly harder to explain as to why would your significant other need protecting?
When people lie to protect someone, most of the time it’s because of menial things such as lying about the quality of the food, their looks, etc.
It gets serious when the subject of the lie is of malicious nature, such as lying about cheating. While both of these lies are told to protect someone, it begs the question of whether the person needs protection if you’ve already hurt them?
People that get cheated on would rather know the truth and be done with it than not being told about it. It’s never good to be in a relationship with a dishonest person. And according to many, once a cheater – always a cheater.
When on the subject of lying to protect, some do it to protect the bond between both individuals. If the person loves being in the relationship, they will oftentimes “not tell” certain stuff so the bond isn’t severed. In most cases, these are menial lies that are harmful by nature but people still do it because of fear.
2. To Cover A Deep, Dark Secret
And here comes to point of the article where we talk about cheating. Whenever someone mentions dishonesty in marriage, the first thought that comes to mind is cheating. Cheating isn’t anything new as millions of couples end up getting divorced because of it.
You do not want to be on the receiving end of this malicious act. Not only does it hurt you emotionally, but it can be potentially damaging. It all depends on how you feel about your significant other. If you’ve been lied to your whole marriage and end up uncovering a deep dark secret, then who knows how your brain will react to this information.
And many people cover their mistakes by being even more dishonest. While no one wants their marriage to fall apart because of their cheating habits, some do in fact lie to protect this bond. Maybe it was a mistake while at your lowest point in life, or maybe that’s what you were looking for all this time.
But it’s safe to say that you end being even more dishonest just to cover for the dishonesty in the first place.
If you’re suspecting your spouse is being dishonest, then you can either do something about it or leave it as it is. Many that don’t investigate will end up with their heartbroken. And it’s better to do something about it than to just sit there helplessly. So if you’re suspecting your spouse of cheating, then maybe it’s time to hire an expert private investigator agency such as SQPI.
3. Some Are Dishonest To Themselves
It is said that what we project towards others is what we are in nature. If we are an aggressive person, then we might project aggression throughout the course of the relationship.
Here is where dishonesty can be quite helpful for the person being dishonest. Namely, lying about stuff isn’t anything new. We’ve all done it, albeit some more than others, and we’ve all been lied to.
But it’s safe to say that certain people are dishonest not to their significant other, but to themselves. It can be quite tricky to understand what that means, but experts call it a coping mechanism.
When in the honeymoon period of the marriage (not the actual honeymoon after a wedding), everything goes smoothly as we are very much in love. We will do everything to protect this period as it is one of the high points of being married.
So whenever we’re dishonest, we’re mostly being dishonest to ourselves. This comes from the need for things to remain normal. And in most cases, we are not aware of this. So, not telling stuff to your spouse, albeit menial stuff, isn’t always a negative thing. It is a negative trait, but not something that would result at the end of the relationship. If you don’t want to anger your spouse by telling them that you had a conversation with your ex down at the convenience store, then it’s better not to start that conversation. Can this be labeled as dishonesty? It is even lying? You be the judge.
Why You Shouldn’t Be Dishonest in Marriage
Regardless of how you look at it, no one wants to be lied to. Sure, small things won’t hurt everybody but certain people want total and complete transparency in marriage.
In some sense, this is precisely what marriage is all about. You’re supposed to tell your spouse if you’ve had a conversation with your ex down at the store.
Lying, albeit to protect, still damages the bond even when you get found it. This might be hard to understand but it is the case nonetheless.
Although there are many more serious things that your spouse can do to you, lying still remains the most common thing. It’s also safe to say that dishonesty is even more dangerous when children are involved.